Infinite darkness, Absolute light
by BrokeFang
Summary: When I was younger I couldn’t get enough of this place but now I realize that it’s just a little piece of something much greater. I've Memories and sights so wonderful that it seems impossilbe that I was ever happy here...
1. 1:Simple and Clean

Infinite darkness, Absolute light.

Chapter1

Disclaimer note:Okay so I don't own Kingdom hearts...I don't own kairi...or Sora...or RIKU!!!!If anyone could sell him to me Id gladly pay...Mawhahaahaha...

Kamui: Now calm down.Settle...

Me: But...Riku...

Kamui: Yes we all know you love him...

Me: I do NOT love Him...I love...opps(slaps hand over mouth)

Kamui: ohhhhhhh...HEY EVERONE BROKE FANG LOVES—

Me: (smacks Kamui) Shove it...or I'll sell YOU.And I know a crapload of girls that would do anything for you...

Kamui:o.0 you wouldn't

Me: Try me.

Kamui: Okay...Ill be good....

The sun was just beginning to rise and reflected its pink and orange skies on the never-ending waters. The sea's salty waves licked the white sand of the clam island. Each wave larger than the last. Than becoming smaller again, only to rise once more. When out of the depths of the sea came a hand.

It was the hand of someone who had once been strong.

Someone who was weakening.

Someone who was losing the will to fight.

Desperate fingers moved franticly.

Reaching and groping weakly for something to cling to, something to grasp, something anything to save him from drowning in the waves.

With a large sucking sound the waves curled back taking the hand with it.

Then the sucking turned into a roar as it came crashing down upon the sand.

Along with it a body.

A body of a young man, battered and broken.

He lay motionless, except for the labored rise and fall of his chest.

His long silver hair rustleing slightly in the wind.

His skin was very pale as if it hadn't seen the light of day for a long while.

Deep gashes and bruises were covering various places of the other wise flawless skin.

His simple black sleeveless shirt was torn and bloody. Deep crimson blood dripped from his cuts staining the white sand.

Suddenly he drew in a sharp breath causing him to gag and spit up seawater.

He took a deep rattling breath,

And another...

Stop...

Breath...

Stop...

Breath...

Soon his breathing became steady, slowly his tired eyes opened to revile bright aquamarine eyes.

He lay there, feeling the sand as it warmed and stuck to his skin.

The spinning of his head.

His body acheing.

Every part of him was battered and had been pushed far beyond their limit.

He didn't dare move. Fearing he would pass out from the pain. He was barely concious as it was.

He had made it...he had finally made it.

It had taken him three whole years

Three long, painful years in the dark...

But he had done it.

He was finally home.

Home to his little island.

Home to his friends.

Home to Kairi.

Home to...Sora.

It was now late in the after noon. And two small rowboats were making there way to the tiny island that was their playground.

"Ill race you!!" Called a girl with shoulder length auburn hair. Her purple blue eyes shining.

She was small and looked delicate, but energy seemed to surge within her.

Her skin a creamy white, seemed flawless, with a good-natured grin spread across her face.

"You're on!!" Answered a boy with spiky cinnamon colored hair.

His eyes were large and a bright blue that sparkled with a mischievous energy.

He was built small and slightly muscular, his skin a lite tan.

A large Cheshire cat grin was spread across his face.

"Okay...on the count of three."

"One..."

"Two..."

"THREE!!!"

The two-boats speed across the water, their occupants laughing happily as the sea spray licked their faces.

"HA!! I bet you Mr. Keyblade master!" The Auburn hair girl giggled as the hopped from her boat and onto the creaky doc.

"I let you win, little miss princess of heart." The boy said with a little pout, as he joined his friend on the doc.

"Oh you're just a sore loser!!"

"Am not"

"Are too."

"Am not"

"Are too."

"AM NOT!!"

"ARE TOO!!"

"AAAAAAMMMM NNNOOOTTT!!!!" He yelled sticking his tongue out.

"AAAAAAAAARRRREEE TTTTTOOOOOOO!!!!" She yelled sticking her tongue out as well.

Suddenly the boy started laughing so hard tears streamed down his face.

"What?" the girl asked.

"You're...ha-ha...face!!"

"What about it?"

"You...You ...YOU LOOKED LIKE A MONKEY!!!" He laughed, cracking up again.

She smacked him on the head with a hard swap.

"God Sora, you're such an Ass..."She snapped swapping him again.

"Gezz Kairi...I was just playing you didn't need ta hit me like that."

"Well you need to learn how to be a graceful loser...Sora? Sora are you even listening to me?!?" Kairi said annoyed. Sora was staring at something far away on the beach.

"SORA HELLO?!?"

Kairi yelled waving her hand in front of his face. Sora caught it and let it drop back to Kairi's side.

"Sora...what are you...doing?" She asked, as Sora jumped from the dock and ran down the shoreline.

"SORA? Wwait up!"

Kairi stammered as she ran after her friend.

"Sora seriously. What's the big deal?" Kairi said panting, finally catching up with her spiky haired friend.

Sora remained silent staring at some thing before his feet.

"SORA SAY SOMETHING!"

Kairi yelled, completely blocked from what was lying at Sora's feet.

"RRiku..." Sora whispered bending down, to touch the silver haired figure as if to check if he was real.

Kairi gasped. There lying on the sandy shore was none other than Riku.

He had been missing for nearly three years now and was pronounced dead when Sora had returned a year and a half ago.

But there he was right in front of them...

He was bloody, broken, battered and unconscious.

But he was breathing...

He was alive...

He was back...

Tears welled in Kairi's bluish purple eyes.

"Riku," She whispered now completely sobbing but smiling all the same.

"RRiku...Riku!!" Sora whispered gently into his friend's ear.

Slowly Riku's heavy eyelids opened to once again revile the aquamarine jewels.

"So...ra?"He whispered voice shaking.

"Riku, I'm here. Its me Sora..."

Sora whispered tears spilling from his face.

"So...ra..." Riku whispered again a tear sliding down his cheek.

Sora put his arm around his broken friend.

"Don't worry Riku I'm right here..."

Well that's all for now...BYE


	2. 2: It's hard to let it go

**Disclaimer: Once again I do not own Kingdom Hearts in anyway what so ever...**

**But...I could...just you wait...evil laughter**

**Kamui: Watch out Riku...**

**Me: one word Kamui, FANGIRLS**

**Kamui:o.0 I'll be quiet**

**Me: I thought so. Now on with the fic!!!**

**This chapter starts out from Riku's POV and him falling trough the darkness...**

**and yes this WILL be a R/S slash story a.k.a a YAOI Story...male/male...**

COME ON I CANT MAKE IT ANY CLEARER!!!So if you re not into that whole "thing"...GO AWAY. But I promise nothing to hard core...trust me nothing above PG as of romance, (simple kisses, hugs, declared love stuffy like that.) Anything above that makes me wanna barf ...

Infinite darkness, Absolute light

Chapter 2

Lost in Infinite darkness.

My body does nothing but fall.

Through unending, eternal abyss

To the bottom of the darkness

I've gone completely numb.

My consciousness is melted in the darkness.

Where am I? Who Am I?

I seem to hear a voice.

It seems that I can hear your voice...

But who _are_ you?

"RRiku..."

Riku?

Wait is that my name?

All of my memories are vague

I can't seem to remember...

Things that I can't forget.

Things that I don't want to forget.

Even though they are very important, even though I don't want to lose them.

Who is it I'm searching for?

Even though I don't want to lose it.

It is gone...

All my memories are lost.

Hidden to me.

Where is the light?

The one I've been searching for?

I know its there

Somewhere far beyond my reach.

Once so close...

But darkness has snatched him from me...

But who _is_ he?

The hand of the darkness, which has entwined me gradually, releases its grip.

And a voice reaches me from far away.

"RRiku...Riku!!"

Riku...

That is my name. Isn't it?

But who is calling for me?

His voice I seem to know.

I can't remember!

As I continue to fall, my soul cries out for you.

I think I should know you.

Who are you?

Your heart illuminates me.

Slowly, the light becomes increasingly brilliant.

A name rushes slowly to my lips...

One I can seem to place...but feels so right.

"So...ra?"

"Riku, I'm here. Its me Sora..."

Yes...

I've been searching for you...Sora.

I've been searching,

For so long.

You voice sooths and comforts me

Pulling me from the dark, which is eating me.

The memories slowly seep into me

As you're light purifies the darkness.

"So...ra"

Your arm slides around my broken and mangled body.

So warm.

Sora's voice.

It awakens me.

From my death black slumber.

Pulling me back to the light ever so slowly.

"Don't worry Riku I'm right here..."

In the midst of my soul's darkness,

Your light shines out and illuminates me.

Your light...

_Tha_t is my light.

My absolute light is you Sora.

I step onto the creaky dock, and stare out in the distance.

Nothing has changed on this tiny island. Everything was the same. I walk along the beach, the white sand shifting under my heavy boots. No one was here at this time of day. Which was fine with me. I couldn't stand being with the others. Especially Sora.

It's been nearly a month sense I returned to the tiny place. The first few days were a blur.

I can't remember anything. But when I woke I found Sora standing over me, as if he'd always been there. He took care of me. Mended my broken body. Never leaving my side.

I couldn't stand it.

I couldn't stand looking at Sora...

It made me feel sick.

I had betrayed him. I tried to hurt him. Hurt Kairi.

I let my self go into the darkness...even after he warned me.

I couldn't forgive myself. I felt so guilty.

Like I'd washed myself a thousands times over but am still dirty.

I'm so filthy compared to you.

Sora...Sora...I just want to tell you how sorry I truly am. But how can I when it pains me just to look in your sky colored eyes?

I didn't know what to say to you...nothing comes...

So I say nothing.

I remain salient.

No words...no nothing.

I am mute....

Sora looked at me asking me things I didn't answer. Finally giving up, only to look at me in a why that made me shatter inside. A look of fear, of sorrow, of hurt.

I'd bitten back a cry.

'I wanted to grab him and shake him, yelling, "It was all my fault. Me. Sora I'm so sorry!"

But I didn't.

I remained mute.

The was no way he'd forgive me...

I stare absentmindedly at the entranceway to the "secret place" we once loved so much.

Sighing I bend down and make my way inside.

This is my refuge. My haven.

Sense I was well enough to come to the island; I've hidden in here.

In our secret place. I can't stand being with the other kids anymore.

Than again I never could.

The only people I could sand were Sora and Kairi.

Now I couldn't stand to even be near them, without felling as tough I'd cry.

So I stayed he. Hidden safe from the world.

Blocking out the world.

Here I was safe...from the harsh reality I created.

_**Flashback**_

"Why are you crying?"

The sliver haired child asked as he came up behind a smaller boy.

He had spiky cinnamon hair, which stuck up every which way.

He was huddled in a ball sobbing on the sandy island they called their playground.

"I said. Why are you crying?" He asked again moving in front of the cinnamon haired boy. He was slightly older than the cinnamon haired child. His soft sliver hair blowing in the cold wind, bright aquamarine eyes shining.

The sea licked the soft white sand and pooled around the boys feet.

Rain started pouring from the sky.

"III..." the spiky haired child spluttered.

"You what?" The other boy replied getting annoyed. He didn't like the rain, and was getting soaked on a count of some little kid who wouldn't stop crying.

All at once the smaller boy looked up and yelled," I LOST MY TEDDY!!!!!!"

He screwed up his face and let large fat tears roll from his blue orb-like eyes.

The silver haired boy rolled his eyes, " how did you lost him?"

"Some **_sniffle_** older kids **_sob_** took Hiiiiimmmmmmm!!"He said sobbing harder. His spiky hair was pasted against his neck from the rain, his tiny frame shaking with tears and the blue orbs shined up at the other boy pitifully.

The sliver hair boy bent down and sighed," Tell you what. If I find your teddy will you stop crying? I hate crying and sad people."

The cinnamon haired boy nodded sticking out his lower lip.

"Okay then, I 'll be back."

The sliver haired boy called running down the small island's shore.

" And I promise I wont come back without your teddy!"

**Later**

It was starting to get dark and the rain had gotten harder; his mother had called the small Cinnamon haired boy inside, without his teddy.

The sliver haired boy still hadn't returned.

"Don't worry Honey we'll find him. I promise"

His mother cooed trying to quiet her son.

"That's **_sniffle_** what the silver haired kid said!"

"What boy?" She asked slightly shocked.

"He said he'd find my teddy, but he never came bbbbaacccccckkkkkkk!"He howled. Tears streaming down his face. When suddenly the doorbell rang.

"Now who would visit in this kind of weather?" She murmured to herself, picking up her still sobbing child and heading for the door.

"Hello may I help—"She stopped and looked down.

The standing on the front door step was the little sliver haired boy, completely soaked to the bone.

His sliver hair a muted gray and hanging limply, aqua eyes contrasting sharply with the gloomy background. He was covered in mud and scratches; little arms holding out a teddy bear with a blue cape flowing from its back and large "S" printed on its stomach.

"Is...is this your teddy?" He asked out of breath.

"SUPER SORA!!!"The cinnamon haired boy exclaimed grabbing the teddy and hugging him warmly.

"Thank yo—"He began by when he looked up the small boy had already ran off without a word of praise.

End flash back 

I sat down in the small cave hugging my self in to a ball.

I looked at the walls, covered in childish scribbled from Sora and me.

When I noticed the pictures but the door.

One of Kairi and Sora.

I Scrambled to the picture and stared at it. One had obviously been drawn by Sora the other by Kairi.That I didn't mind, but what struck me was what they were doing.

They were feeding the papou to each other.

My heart broke.

'_**Hey Riku! Look what I got!'**_

'_**What?'**_

'_**A papou! Come on lets share it!'**_

'_**Share...it?'**_

'_**Yeah! The legend says if you share the papou with some else your destiny will forever be intertwined!'**_

'_**Yeah so?'**_

'_**I want us to be friends forever! So if we eat this no matter what happens we'll be together!'**_

"So it was true.

Sora and Kairi did share the papou. I hadn't been dreaming that day.

It was all true. Sora cared more for Kairi. My friendship doesn't matter to him anymore."

Giggle.

"Oh course it dose you idiot you! You mean more to Soar than life itself!"

I whipped my head around, nearly snapping my neck in the process.

"How would you know, tan'itsusei? "

**Me; Well that's all for now!!**

**BYE!!!**

**Kamui: Didn't you forget something?**

**Me; What?**

**Kamui: clears throat8 BROKEFANG LOVES DOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Me: EEP! My SERCETS BEEN REVILED!!**

**(Well it really wasn't a secret...)**

**NOW YOU SAHLL PAY KAMUI!!!! FANGIRLS ATTACK!!!!!**

**KAMUI:O. 0 AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**Me: bye for now remember to R&R Pray for Kamui!**


	3. 3:Nothings Like Before

Disclaimer note: Like I told you before I DO NOT own Kingdom Hearts in any way and/or manner. So stop asking...

**I 'd like to Dedicate this Chapter To LamKyion A.K.A DarkwingedKyo**

**Ky found the Japanese meaning for unity for me so Tan'itsusei would have a name.**

**She also wrote the poem, which is used in this chapter. **

**(Tan'itsusei says it in a flashback, I made the flash back just so the poem could be included in the story!)**

**Ky has also been there to help me get my bum in gear.**

**(Thanks for the emails Ky)**

**She's been reading this ficcy before I even planned on putting it up.**

**Thank you so much SH.You are the best. Love ya lots!!!**

**(HUGGLEZ!)**

**(Side note: Tan'itsusei Calls Sora Soar quite often and I d just like to let you know it's not a typo it wanted it to be that way. She also calls Riku 'Ku,**

**And Kairi Kai Kai)**

**Now on with the story!!!!!!!!**

Infinite Darkness, Absolute Light 

**Chapter 3:Nothings like before**

"And what would you know about it, Tan'itsusei?"I snapped.

Tan'itsusei giggled, scrunched up her nose, and wiggled at finger at me.

"Don't you snap at me Mister." I rolled my eyes. God she was an odd one.

" So you still wont talk to Soar huh 'Ku?"Tan'itsusei said straightens herself.

I flinched at the topic.

"No..."I whispered hanging my head.

She sighed, as she slowly made her way to the wooden door that had once leaded to the other worlds. She caressed the door with her tiny hand and turned towards me.

Her normally pleasant and cheerful face bore a sad smile, and her golden eyes stared sightlessly at me. Tan'itsusei had no sight. She was as blind as the very depths of darkness itself. Yet even though see couldn't see me, my face my eyes, it seemed she could see something much deeper. Like my very soul was a book for her sightless eyes to gaze upon.

Tan'itsusei had also been a prisoner of the Heartless, just as I had been.

Maleficent had poisoned her mind at the age of seven years old.

Being so young so naïve she gave in easily. She did all of her dirty work, became a pon to the darkness. Soon Maleficent got bored with the young girl, and locked her away in Kingdom Hearts. All alone. To fade into nothingness. That was how I met her. In the mist of my imprisonment found hope in Tan'itsusei; who has spent nearly 4 years of her life in the hellish abyss.4 years. And she never lost faith; she always looked on the bright side of things, even when there was no light to be found.

"_When ever I'm sad I just remember the sunlight and what's waiting outside. And that gives me the will to keep going. The promise of sunlight washing over me...what keeps you going 'Ku? What do you want to see behind that door?"_

She was so much like him. She treated everything thing with a determined headstrong attitude. Optomistic, with a sweet childish naive look upon the world; she could see no evil. She was one who believed anything and everything had a pure heart. That no one truly belonged to the darkness. She was the same, yet so different.

Can there be a difference between Pure and absolute light?

Is there?

"He really cares for you."Tan'itsusei whispered turning back to the wooden door, caressing it once again.

"No he doesn't..." I answered back, my voice a sharp whisper.

"And what makes you think that Riku?"

I remained silent.

"Is it that stupid picture? Is it Riku?"

I didn't even dare to breath.

"Is it? Or are you too coward to answer? Is that it Riku? Are you hiding? Answer!"

I had snapped.

"YES!!! It's all of that. The picture. Me hiding. I AM A COWARD!!!!

When we were younger Sora and I shared a papou together. So we could remain best friends forever. Than Kairi moved to the island. He started to hang out with her more and more. Leaving me behind. Our play dates became fewer and fewer, shorter and shorter. And one day Sora told me he'd shared the papou with her. He told me Kairi meant a lot to him and he didn't want to lose her. That he wanted her to be his best friend forever...That tore me apart. Sora was the world to me. My one and only friend. The only person to ever be kind to me. To treat me as something other than a china doll. Pretty and pleasant for display, but too fragile to be let out lest the beauty cracked. Sora didn't treat me that way...he protected me.Even if I didn't need protecting...He...he was the one person I cared about. And to be completely forgotten hurt much more than it normally should. The only way to become a part of Sora's life was to compete for his Beloved Kairi's attention, even if it was really his I wanted. I wanted him to smile at me. For us to be the way we used to be. And in the process I gave into the darkness. So now I hide from him, because I 'm nothing but an idiot who was stupid enough to give into the darkness just because I wanted to leave this god-forsaken island with Sora! But he didn't even want to go with me! All he cared about that night was Kairi! He doesn't care for me! He hates me! I made him afraid of me!"

Tan'itsusei stared at me for a few minutes. The silence stuttering my heated words which still rung in the air.

Than she.... smiled.

She smiled and broke out laughing.

"God "Ku you are so DENSE!!"She giggled.

What-was-her-problem?

"Why?"

"You didn't see Sora after he came back." She said her smile dropping her voice serious once again.

I turned silent.

"If you'd seen him, you would know that you're the one thing Soar cares the most for."

FLASHBACK 

"Kairi?"

Sora slowly opened his eyes, to find Kairi and Tan'itsusei standing over him.

"Sora! How are you feeling?"

The auburn haired girl asked, purple eyes sparkling with concern, yet filled with joy at hearing Sora speak.

"I'm fine..."Sora stopped.

Rubbing his head he looked round the room, and slowly fixed his gaze back on Kairi.

"Where's Riku?"Sora asked in a concerned voice.

"He is okay right? He's not hurt is he? Well say something where is He? Where's Riku!!!??"

Tan'itsusei turned away from Sora, shoulders shaking. Kairi wrapped her arms around the younger girls body comforting her.

"Where's Riku?"Sora tested again sternly.

Kairi slowly met her spiky haired friends sky blue eyes.

"Sora....I...I..."She stopped voice dieing in her throat.

"You what? Where's Riku!"He was getting sick of this. He wanted to know where is best friend was and if he was okay. And he wanted to know now.

"Oh Sora.He ...He never came back! We haven't seen nor heard from him. I'm so sorry!"

Kairi said tears welling in her purple eyes, Sora sat still as stone staring at his hands.

"I'm so sorry..."Kairi whispered holding Tan'itsusei tighter as she continued sob.

Suddenly Sora jumped from his bed and sprinted to the door.

"Sora!?Where are you going?"Kairi voiced dumfounded.

"I gotta find Riku!"He yelled before he disappeared beyond the doorframe.

"RIKU?!"

"RIKU?!"

Sora yelled his voice echoing in the small cave, which was once their favorite hiding place. He went up to the wooden door, which was now sealed forever.

The door that had once lead to other worlds.

The door that had lead him home.

The door that could lead him to Riku...

Taking a step back Sora summoned light to his hand, which slowly took the form of his precious Keyblade.

With a deep breath Sora swung his Keyblade back and "**TWACK" **smacked the door with his Keyblade.

"Riku **wack** I'll save **wack** you!!!**" Wack wack wack**

The door stood unharmed by The Keyblade master's attacks. This only angered Sora causing his attacks to multiply.

"WACK, WACK, WACK" 

Sora attacked the door for hours, making large gashes in the dark wood. Eventually he dropped to his knees and tore that the accursed door with his bare hands.

"Riku! Riku don't worry I'll get up out!"

He yelled digging his nails deep into the wood surface.

He scraped and banged against the door like a wild animal locked in a cage, calling Riku's name all the while.

He didn't stop.

Not when his hand had rubbed raw.

Not when they began to bleed.

Not when his voice grew horse form yelling.

Not when his whole body began to ache, begging for rest.

Not when Kairi showed up pleading for him to stop.

Sora did not stop.

He wouldn't stop...

He couldn't stop....

Suddenly Tan'itsusei spoke,

"Lost in infinite darkness,

Eternity at hand.

Searching for forgiveness,

In a land where the light cannot be found.

Sky and Earth are no longer one,

Ripped apart by unfortunate destinies.

An Oath Keeper Sky is, to his sweet of separation.

Lost is Earth, crying in desperate for his redemption.

For purity of hearts lies within unity

And hope can still remain.

As long as faith is not lost,

Sky and Earth shall be reunited once again."

Sora turned to stare at Tan'itsusei eyes wide.

"Soar," She began slowly.

"Sora, Riku _will_ come back. He may not be here now, or tomorrow. But he_will_ come back. Sky and Earth are meant to be together. So stop this Sora. Stop looking for him. Let him find you. Wait Sora. Just wait. He'll come back you just have to keep faith."

Sora stared up into Tan'itsusei's sightless eyes blankly.

Slowly his lip began to quiver, he screwed up his face and balled.

"Riku...I'm...I'm so. ...Sssssoooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy..."He cried between sobs.

Kairi moved to her friend's side as Tan'tsusei fell to her knees and began to cry as well.

Kairi hugged her two friends tight as she joined them in tears.

END FLASH BACK 

"After that day Soar moved to spending each day on the papou island. Saying he was watching it for you. There he waited. Every morning he'd make his way to the island and sit on the papou tree all day. Than at night he'd watch the stars and swing his keyblades around like a manic, hoping and praying that one might some how bring you home.

He'd do that everyday Riku.... _everyday_. Sun, rain, snow. It didn't matter. He'd be on that island everyday. Soar does care for you 'Ku.... _more than anything_. Which means to him there's nothing you need to be forgiven for...."

I stared at the small girl standing before me. Taking her in. She reminded me of Kairi in a way. Tan'itsusei was about a head shorter than Kairi, which was saying a lot sense Kairi had only grown a few inches sense she turned 13.Her hair was a rich ivory black, short on one side and long on the other. The longer side stuck up in a way that reminded me of Sora's gravity defining hair. She was tiny and seemed very delicate, but like Kairi had a strong will and determination which should never be taken lightly. She wore a Dress like aqua shirt, which was edged in a deep pink. Barely visible shorts of the same color peeked out from behind the over large shirt. On both her arms was mesh sleeves stretched between two armbands the same color as her shirt. Tan'itsusei a skin that was nearly as pale as mine but seemed warmer as if a light and energy were shining through. Her face was pleasant and her sightless golden eyes stared at me all knowing.

My eyes fell at last on the pent round her slim neck.

A smoothly polished amber heart dangles from a thin silver chain. I remember giving that to her...

"**Tan'itsusei Go now!"**

"**But...'Ku! I don't wanna go without you! Plus I don't have a Keyblade, Maleficent took mine..."**

"**Here take this."**

"**But that's your mummy's necklace."**

"**It's also a Keychain. It's called 'Purity'. Please Tan'su...take it!"**

"**But...but...."**

"**Get out of here! You deserve a better life than rotting away in this hellhole. You deserve the sun and the stars, not this unchanging blackness. Don't stay because of me! Please just go! Go to my home in place of me okay? "**

"...'**Ku..."**

"**PLEASE just go Tan'su! The door it's closing! Hurry!"**

"Thank you...Bye 'ku...."

I shook my head to stop the old memories and focus on our discussion.

"There no way Sora could have forgiven me Tan'su...."

I sighed turning away from her.

"God 'Ku you are daft! You don't want Sora to forgive you because you can't forgive yourself!"

God it was freaky how good her guesses were.

The cave when quiet.

"Sora means Sky,"Tan'itsusei stated quietly.

"What?" I wasn't sure if she had said it to her self or me... but either way, it was completely random.

"Sora means Sky.Riku means Earth.Kairi means Separation."

She finished apparently talking to me more than herself.

"Yeah so? Why should I care what our names mean?"

"We don't choose our names. Tan'itsusei whispered.

"Well yeah...our parents do." I was getting irritated.

"Wrong. Fate chooses our names. Our parents are willed by fate to choose our names.

Our name marks not only _who_ we are. But _who_ we will become.

You and Sora were meant to be together. The Earth and Sky.

Kairi than was destined to tear you apart. Separation."

I stared.

I had never thought of it that way before...but either way.

"That doesn't mean Sora has forgiven me...we are still and always will be separated.

"God Riku! You are raving idiot! Tan'itsusei. It's not even a real name, yet it's mine. Tan'itsusei means 'Unity' to unite'. You to will be together once again. Riku listen to me. Soar has already forgiven you. I know that for sure. Cause to him there was probly nothing to forgive in the first place. But if you really don't believe me look there."

I crawled over to where Tan'itsusei was pointing.

There etched in the wall was a crudely drawn picture of myself.

Large feathered wings bloomed from my back.

Under the picture was Sora's untidy handwriting.

'You are light lost within the dark...'

I felt tears prickle, and sting at the back of my eyelids. A large lump formed in my throat making it hard to breath. I turned to Tan'itsusei.

"He blames himself. After all that? After all those horrid things I did? After I tied to hurt Kairi? After I tried to hurt him? He should hate me. I know I do. But no...he blames himself..."I stopped the lump in my throat was making it hard to talk.

"'Ku..."Tan'itsusei whispered.

"Why don t you do something to prove how sorry you are. Do something for Soar. Here..."

Tan'itsusei handed me a fat leather bound book. I looked at the book and than at Tan'itsusei and than back at the book.

"It's from Selphie. It's a bunch of photos I think. And this is from Kai Kai."

She said handing me a CD. . Kai Kai? Who the hell was Kai Kai? Did she mean Kairi?

She must. She's given Sora and me both pet names why stop there?

I hope so...

"They both wanted to help as well."

"What am I supposed to do with these?"

"I donno you'll think of something." She said with a huge grin.

I stared into her huge golden eyes. Thinking she already knows what lies ahead.

I stood up slowly not truly trusting my legs to hold me.

"Tan'su...Thanks..." I whispered hugging the younger girl.

She giggled and hugged me back. I could feel her face burning against the bare skin of my cheek. She was blushing.

"You most defiantly live up to your name Tan'su."

She gave me a shocked look and then beamed up at me. I had just made her day with that hug. I smiled slightly.

Turning away, I headed for the tunnel that leads outside.

"Oh just one more thing...How did you know where the picture was?"

"I may be blind 'Ku but I can see ten times better than other people."

She giggled smiling.

"Baka," I whispered running out the entrance. I was going to prove my self to Sora,

Even if he doesn't think there's anything I need to prove.

"**_What keeps me going? What gives me the will to go on? What do I want to see beyond the door? What I want to see, what keeps me going Tan'su is Sora. He's waiting for me somewhere beyond that door and that's where I want to be...with him...like I promised..."_**

_Me: Aw...wasn't that sweet?_

**Kamui: Met meff muttma mere!!!(Get me outta here!!!)**

**Me: Hee hee...pay no mind to Kamui he's having the time of his life...with the fan girls...(Evil laughter)**

**Kamui: MELF!!!! (Help)**

**Me: Hee-hee. ...Well that's all for now! The next chapter is...**

**Chapter 4:When You Walk Away...**

**And it's from Sora's POV!!!**

**R&R everyone! See ya!**

**Kamui: Mlmase Melf mmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeee...**

**(Please help mmmmmmmeeeeeeeee....)**

**Me: STOP TRANSLATING WHAT HE SAYS!!!!!**


	4. 4:When You Walk Away

**Disclaimer note: Yet again I have failed in buying Kingdom Hearts...So therefore I am still not owner of Kairi, Sora, or Riku... which is quite a shame because I could do some very "Interesting" things to the story....**

(Hey But I do kinda own Touitsu.... that's gotta count for something.)

**This is an "Interesting chapter"**

**Riku's POV tends to be more sad and regretting, cause that's how he feels.**

**So Sora being the ...ah...person he is **

**Is utterly lost and confused, and not being well the brightest ...**

**Well lets just say the dialog is MUCH more different than for Riku's**

(Well it turns out...I've been using the wrong spelling for Tan'itsusei's name...

**It's really supposed to be spelled**

**Touitsu**

**Not Tan'itsusei**

**So ignore how it was spelled in the last chapter....)**

Infinite Darkness, Absolute Light

Chapter 4: When You Walk Away...

Sora's POV 

"_**Hakari no naka e."**_

_(Into the light)_

"**_Sude ni..."_**

_(It's already too late...)_

As the sun began to fade stars began to faintly wink their shining bodies at me.

I smiled.

This was my favorite time of day.

The time when the stars had not yet graced the skies with their full presence yet.

The time when the sky was kissed with pale pinks and oranges giving up it pallet of usual blues.

Seated on the curved papou tree I stretched my legs out and gazed up at the beautiful sky.

I placed my gloved hands behind my head just drinking in the skies beauty.

Suddenly I heard a rustling noise from behind me. Quickly I turned round to just in time to see the sun catch long silver hair in a dazzling halo.

Smiling my Cheshire cat grin I hopped of the papou tree, being careful not to fall off the small isle (again); just in time to see Riku emerge from the tunnel and begin to scan the beach.

I stared at him hope swelling in my chest like a large over inflated balloon.

"Maybe today will be the day..."

Riku really hadn't changed much as of looks. He hadn't grown a lot, muscular wise yes but height wise not really. He was still taller than me of coarse but not by much.

A black sleeveless shirt cascaded across his muscular frame. He seemed thinner. Which gave me the thought that he hadn't been eating much.

Which kinda worried me...

Because the Riku I knew ate just as much as me.

Which is constantly.

Except more politely I guess...and well not quite as much.

_OKAY_ so maybe not constantly, but ...the point is he really is **_way_** to skinny

Shocking aquamarine eyes, contrasted sharply with his ghostly pallor.

God did I love those eyes. It was really easy to get lost in them ...kinda like some weird force commanded you to look and never break the gaze.

(Kairi feels the same way...)

I didn't know anyone who wasn't blown away by them.

Some people say they look like emeralds or jewels of some queer thing like that.

And I guess they do, but

They remind me more of the sea.

Just as deep and just as captivating.

(And sometimes just as fierce...)

His angelic silver hair was longer now, nearly reaching his waist, and shining in the sun's fading light.

Slowly Riku's eyes set upon me. I could feel my grin grow and that balloon full of hope expand to enormous proportions. Franticly I waved to Riku.

"Please don't look away...Please don't look away...Please don't look away..."

His eyes grew wide, and than sad as turned away from me.

"He looked away..."

_**)(POP)(**_

The over inflated hope balloon exploded.

Smashed by an evil little rock of doubt, which had now settled in my gut.

Damn how I despised that little rock.

It made me think of things I didn't want to hear.

_Does he hate me?_

Go away little voice! Go away little balloon popping hope smashing rock

GO AAWAY!

I lowered my arm, letting it hang limply at my side. My grin all but gone.

_Maybe he does hate me_

"KU!"

A giggling sweet voice echoed and hung in the air.

I could barely even have time to register the yell and whom it was coming from before a number of things happened.

Touitsu launched from the tunnel and attached herself to a shocked Riku's back.

The tiny girl somehow summoned up enough force to not only knock Riku over, but to send him flying from where he was standing to the shore below.

Riku sat up looking slightly dizzy and confused. Touitsu was giggling uncontrollably as she wrapped her arms round Riku's neck and affectionately buried herself into his silken hair.

The confusion faded and was replaced by a gentile smile.

Just a small smile.

Tired and wary.

Not at all like the overconfident and cocky grin he had once bore.

But a smile nonetheless.

I watched as Touitsu spoke to Riku.

As Riku answered and gave a small chuckle.

I felt that very same balloon crushing rock grow even larger and sink deeper into my gut, damn little rock!!!

I thought I told you to go away!!

Reminding me of all the things I try to block out...

"Ahhhhhh here comes the voice again."

I moaned, clutching my head. Now having gone completely insane.

Not only did Riku talk for Touitsu,

But he laughed for her,

He smiled for her.

He _looked_ at her...

That was what hurt.

All I wanted was for Riku to look at me.

The way he used to too.

Without fear, sorrow, or hesitation.

I didn't matter to me that Riku didn't talk to me or smile at me.

I just wanted him to look at me....

I miss that cocky grin and way he'd always roll his eyes at me when I'd ask him to fight me sigh as he'd nod in agreement and than tussle my hair before grabbing his wooden sword...

Even though I still can't figure out why'd he rolled his eyes like that...

I don't care...

If you never smile or laugh with me again ...

I don't even care if you never talk to me again.

Well actually...

I think I'd go crazy if he'd never talk to me again.

He tried that once when we were seven, it only lasted a few minutes but it drove insane!

But at least then I knew that he was only mad at me because I accidentally threw up in his new hat and forgot to tell him about it...it didn't end well for either of us.

But now I have no freaking idea!

All I want is...

Is...

I don't know what I want.

I'm so confused...

"WHY IS LIFE ALWAYS SO CONFUSING!!!!"

I yelled pulling at my hair forgetting that Riku and Touitsu can must likely hear and see me.

Trying to regain my composer I turned my attention to Riku and Touitsu, who were both back on their feet.

Touitsu was griping Riku's arm tightly as she said something to him.

Riku was brushing the last of the sand from his hair and blushed at whatever it was Touitsu had said.

Slowly he looked up at me, his eyes meting mine.

Aqua into blue.

A sad gaze staring into a shocked one.

Slowly his mouth formed my name.

"Sora..."

Touitsu looked up in my general direction. Her sightless eyes lit up and she waved franticly at me.

God it was freaky how she could see things without _really seeing _them.

"SOAR!!!"

She yelled giggling jumping up and down still clutching tightly to Riku's arm.

I waved back still feeling the shock from Riku actually making contact with me.

Touitsu giggled again nudging Riku, Riku stole another glance at me and raised a hand in greeting.

I felt the pit of my stomach explode, and that little demon rock dissolve in a whirlwind of confusion and a crap load of other emotions that I can't quite place at this moment.

For the fact of I think my brain just died, from shock.

The gaze broke.

Touitsu waved one last wave and headed down the shore with Riku.

I stood rooted in my place not really sure of what had just happened.

Staring out at the spot that Riku and Touitsu had just occupied.

My brain had just drawn a complete blank...

"What ya doing?"

I turned round to see a glance of lilac before I stumbled and

Fell over the side of the small island.

Water rushed into my nostrils and gulping mouth; my hand reached for the faraway surface as I swore out soundlessly.

'God damnit.'

I swore inwardly as I punched the water.

I swear Kairi is determined to drown me.

I emerged a few seconds later gasping for breath.

"God Kairi! Why do you do that?!"

I yelled up at the auburn haired girl on the island who was currently laughing her ass off.

"I don't mean to, you're just a klutz."

She yelled back.

I gave her my best Sora death glare, which wasn't very effective no matter how hard I try. So I pouted instead...

I Wish I had a death glare like Riku's than people wouldn't mess with me.

"So what where you thinking about?"

Kairi asked sitting down beside me as we stared at the sky together.

"Nothing..."

I said shrugging.

Kairi turned to look at me.

"You were thinking about Riku weren't you?"

'_God Do **all** the girls on this island have some kind of weird physic power?'_

Dimly I nodded.

"Hee-hee you're so predicable,"

She said giggling and than turned her attention to the star filled sky.

"So what world is that one Sora?"

She asked pointing out to the brightest star, which flickered in the sky.

"Traverse Town,"

I whispered, staring up at the star.

"Oh! I remember that place. Isn't that where I gave you oath keeper?"

She asked excitedly, picking at the star shaped keychain, which hung from her lavender belt.

"Yep that'd be the place..."

I said looking at the Auburn haired girl.

She smiled and set her head on my shoulder hugging my arm.

I blushed deeply as her auburn hair feel over my shoulder.

"I liked that placed, it was so lovely... you could always see the stars,"

She turned her head slightly to look at me.

"Do you miss it there?"

I stared down at the ground watching my shoe as I formed a small pattern in the sand.

"....Yea...A lot..."

"Sora...if...if the door could be opened again would you...would you leave?

Would you get off this island? Even if you couldn't come back?"

She turned her head down; I could tell she was blushing.

You know I've never thought of that before...

I've wanted to get off the island, every sense I got back

I've wanted to leave...I never noticed how confining this island is.

When I was younger I couldn't get enough of this place but now...I realize that it's just a little piece of something much, much greater.

The worlds I've explored the people I've met.

The friends I've made.

I remember Traverse Town and the never-ending starlight.

The damp chill and amazing view of Hallow bastion.

Fighting pirates in Neverland.

I've seen walking cards as tall as a man in Wonderland.

Became a true hero at the coliseum.

I've summoned a laughing genie a vengeful little pixie and a sweet little deer.

I've swum in oceans that I can breathe like air as I followed a red haired mermaid.

I remember them all...

Memories and sights so wonderful that it seems impossible to even think I was somewhat happy before...

They're all so far away now. So very far.

Before I knew it I was crying.

Silent sobbing as my whole body shook from the memories I loved so much.

"I miss it...I miss it so much it hurts..."

I touched my chest and griped the fabric to my vest tightly.

"It hurts so very much, knowing I will never be able to go back..."

Suddenly rain stared to fall from the star kissed sky, damping my spiky hair and plastering it to my back.

"You'll be able to go back Sora,"

Kairi whispered reaching out through the rain to catch my hand in a tight grasp.

"But there are still things that you have to do here, and when you finish them we can all go together, you, me, Touitsu and...Riku."

I looked up at her.

Auburn hair sticking to her creamy white skin, Purple eyes smiling at me.

"Kairi..."

I whispered hugging her; She meant so much to me.

Like a little sister a Big sister and a friend combined in one.

She knew everything about me...kind of like Touitsu and Riku.

She knew exactly how I felt and what I wanted.

"Thank you..."

Kairi smiled and hugged me back.

As we embraced I felt my smile return and the rain disappear from sky above.


End file.
